Wow. Sorry to hear that - really. I'm at school presently and have spent a few years designing my clinic. Any medical school is going to leave you in an incredible amount of debt, that's for sure. I do believe though that although you sound like you've been through hell, you have an enormous potential for healing - past that of an herbalist, (although they can be incredibly knowledgeable, they can't stitch people up or perform gyn exams, etc).
One thing I like 'bout medicine is that you're always necessary. If there's a crisis, you know what to do in health care. Isn't that an amazing feeling? For me, it's worth the debt. Knowledge holds more power than money and with this the potential for stability. My opinion.
I'm so sorry about your kids. I could live poor and do what I love, but the part about your story that really impacts me is the custody loss of your babes.
Thinkin' good thoughts for you -